So I started culinary school. This is why I've not posted anything. I don't want to post a recipe that is plagiarised. I have a few recipes coming up that aren't stolen and are as original as can be.

Pecan Pie!

1 pre-made pie crust (you can make you own, but I'm too lazy for that)
1 1/2 to 2 cups pecans
2 eggs, whisked
1/4 cup butter, melted
1 to 2 teaspoons vanilla extract (I like it a bit sweet, so I use 2 teaspoons)
2 tablespoons flour (though I've used pancake mix before as the flour had weevils in it)
1/2 cup of sugar (I prefer Sugar in the Raw)
1 cup light Karo corn syrup
A splash of Laird's AppleJack (optional, but it's delicious so you should use it.)
A dash of salt

Preheat oven to 350 F. Using a nine inch pie pan, lay in the pie crust and cut off any access. Add in the pecans. In a bowl mix the other ingredients until completely blended. Side note, if I was hard pressed for an amount, I'd use 1 tablespoon of the AppleJack, but that is based entirely on taste. Once the mixture is mixed, pour over the pecans. Bake for 1 hour.

Of Fucking Course

Republicans rule for Walmart whilst the Democrats rule in favor of the people getting screwed out of equal pay. Okay. That's a teeny tiny bit hyperbolic, but goddamit. Walmart isn't some oppressed, downtrodden small business. And even if they were, women should be paid equally. This just really grates my grits. Sorry (not really), but if some men can't handle women being equal in the work place, they shouldn't be working in a capitalist country and voting for the party that just looooooves capitalism, Just sayin'.

So, I've been wanting to update, but I can't. Why? Well, I'm working for a call center right now. No access to Facebook. No access to anything, really. Lame. My job right now is to call doctor offices to make sure the info is correct. I have to place 40 calls an hour. Mind you, I'm getting paid $12 and hour, so I'm not certain what my insivtive is...nevertheless...life is interesting. Receptionists think I'm Gestapo. I've learned how to lie very well. Though, that's only 'cos I can't make eye contact. Gah. I hate everything right now.

So, as of a week ago, I've not had a phone. It should be coming today, supposedly, before 3:00 PM. The wacky thing is is that before when I had a phone and was therefore more reachable, I could go a few days without hearing from my recruiter. Now that I'm only reachable via email, I've actually missed out on several jobs. On Thursday I was bombarded with emails for work before 9:30 AM. Unfortunately I didn't see any of them until after 10:00 AM. I can't wait for my phone to get here. I'm going bonkers without it.

So tonight, Rob is sleeping early. I think he's sleeping off all the beers he drank and all the zombies he slaughtered earlier. So it's just me and the streaming Netflix. I've been watching the first season of the Cosby show. One of my first memories is the Cosbys. I wanted to run away to New York and live with them. Hey! I grew up in the 80's. The funny thing is that watching the show as an adult in the 2000's, I can still relate. What is funny to me is the banter and dynamic between Clair and Cliff. It reminds me of me and Rob. And that is awesome!

Teabaggers

So last night was the State of the Union. I'm a politics nerd, so this is like my Super Bowl. Last night there was the opposing party response. There was also a Tea Party response. Here's some of what I call batshit fuckery:



Did the mom from Bobby's World really compare Obama to Iwo Jima and the Tea Party to those soldiers raising the flag? And what the hell is she looking at. Not once did Bachmann  look into the camera. Was someone off to the side holding up a stuffed animal to get her attention like when kids get their picture taken? What was up with the charts? How did this crazy woman make it as far as she has? Do people really think she's got anything non-crazy and valid to say? She makes Sarah Palin seem almost sane.

CHICKENS!!!!1!

One time, after leaving the bar down the street, my brother and a friend ran into a chicken that was hanging out on the street corner by our apartment. I keep an eye out for a chicken every time I go out now. See, other than a puppy or a monkey, I have always wanted a chicken. Alas, I've yet to see one hanging out on the street corner.

One like one of these little guys would make me very happy. I'd name him Steve.

Bored. Bored. Bored.

I've been incredibly bored lately. Other than traveling back to my home town, then to another town outside the town I lived in for nearly three years, things have been rather routine. Wake up, watch the news, drink an espresso based beverage(thanks Mr RogueKitten!), go to work, sit in the public seating place on Madison Ave for lunch, go home, eat supper, watch TV, then go to bed. Weekends have been the same except for the work bit. So I've been wracking my brain thinking of how to liven things up.

1) Adopt a puppy. Yes Mr RogueKitten says he's against it, but maybe I can keep trying to talk him into it. I've even come up with a name. Lola Buena Chichis. I think s/he will be the most elegant dog ever.

2) Start a band. I really think that people would love to hear a band influenced by The Smiths, Slayer, and Billie Holiday. 

3) Attempt to come up with a cake recipe without relying on a cookbook. This can only end well I reckon.

4) Stop being so boring myself. There's a reason a certain cliche is a cliche.

George Pondering

My name is George and I am a dollar bill. According to the date on the lower right side of me, I am one year old. For people, one year old is just a baby. A one year old is all fresh and new. For a one year old dollar bill, it's pretty raggedy. Already I have a tear half-way down my center. It's all taped up now thanks to the nice coffee vendor I was handed to this morning.

So far this morning, it's only about eleven, I have fallen out of someone's pocket, been carried by the breeze into a grimy puddle, and picked up by a man in a suit who was kind enough to try and dry me off with his handkerchief. That was my journey today.

My friends, Other George and Hammy were already here when the vendor took me in. That Hammy is a laugh riot. He's a bit cranky and always talking of revolting. They are gone now. Given to a nice lady who got a coffee and bagel. They always go to the nice ladies while I always seem to end up in some guy's smelly pocket. Oh well. I like taking trips and don't really care where my life as a dollar takes me. So long as I don't wind up in the same stink pocket as that guy who looks like Keith Richards.

I'm Gonna Try Something Out

Since I want to keep this blog (I loathe that word. That and "iPod") up to date because apparently there's two, count 'em TWO, people who read this on occasion and I wanna keep them entertained. Shit, maybe more than two people will eventually start reading this. The reason I haven't been good about updating is that I just didn't have anything to say really. That and I'm an abnormally mediocre writer. That being said, at school I'm taking a remedial writing course and am actually getting pretty decent. So I'm going to start posting some of the writing exercises we've been doing. Let me know what y'all think of some of the short stories I post.

New Entries Coming Soon

So stay tuned bishes. In the mean time, check out http://benschronicle.blogspot.com/ and http://ovidabroad.blogspot.com/

If I lived In Afganistan....

Mr RogueKitten could deprive me of food in exchange for sex. Hmmmm.... I cook my husband's food....poison his ass? It makes me wonder how many women are putting up with this. http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/aug/14/afghanistan-womens-rights-rape.
Fortch, I'm lucky. Mr RogueKitten considers me an equal.

Tomorrow I'm The Twat Who Tries To Give You A Flier

Flier? Flyer? Neither seems correct. I'm up later than I'd like to be considering I need to leave early-ish and have to interact with people. Ah, the life of a temp. My job is handing out fliers about kids' food. Vienna sausages? Cheerios? I have an orientation about the product and it's a short shift. 9:15-:3:00. Not too bad. Though, I really am not looking forward to it. But, it's a job and I really need it. Business has been very slow lately. I need to remember to record The View tomorrow.

What's Going on New Year's

A new year and hopefully new and better things on the horizon. I've got some high-ish hope for 2009. Hopefully my family will do okay this year, maybe Obama will keep his promises for things he's going to get done on day one, school for me, career happiness for Rob, a better economy would be nice. Lot's of things I'm hoping for though I'm feeling a bit cynical about the economy and the world around me.
Making no resolutions because making resolutions is a waste of goddam time.
Whoever reads this blog, I hope you have a good New Year's! Now I'm off to wear a cute dress, freeze my arse off and have a nice date with my hubby.

Yes We Can

And we did. Obama is now president! I'm over the fucking moon. Last night when it was announced you could hear shouts and hollers all around. I've never felt so proud of my country.
This is so huge. I wonder if this is similar to how people felt when JFK won the election.
No Obama isn't going to be able to fix all this mess, at least not anytime soon. But he will improve things and lay down the frame work for the future. I'm so happy to because maybe this will help race relations in our country and the way the world sees us. My children won't think about race or things like that. They will see a Black president and they will know that anybody, no matter what, can achieve their dreams and goals. Obama, I am so proud of you.

Keep Your Seat Belts On. We're Almost There Kids

My stomachs in knots over this whole election thing. It's been going on forever and I'm happy it's almost over. The main thing that's got me nervous is that whilst I'm pretty damn sure Obama's got it in the bag there's that part of me that thinks he still is going to lose it. Yeah, the 2000 election kinda bittered me.
Got a bottle the whiskey, beer, wine, and voddy on hand....
See y'all Wednesday!

Bye Paul :(

Paul Newman died yesterday at 83 years old. He'd been suffering cancer.
Dammit I need a Newman-O. Sad.

The Newman Foundation issued this statement:

"Paul Newman's craft was acting. His passion was racing. His love was his family and friends. And his heart and soul were dedicated to helping make the world a better place for all. Paul had an abiding belief in the role that luck plays in one's life, and its randomness. He was quick to acknowledge the good fortune he had in his own life, beginning with being born in America, and was acutely aware of how unlucky so many others were. True to his character, he quietly devoted himself to helping offset this imbalance. An exceptional example is the legacy of Newman's Own. What started as something of a joke in the basement of his home, turned into a highly-respected, multi-million dollar a year food company. And true to form, he shared this good fortune by donating all the profits and royalties he earned to thousands of charities around the world, a total which now exceeds $250 million. While his philanthropic interests and donations were wide-ranging, he was especially committed to the thousands of children with life-threatening conditions served by the Hole in the Wall Camps, which he helped start over 20 years ago. He saw the Camps as places where kids could escape the fear, pain and isolation of their conditions, kick back, and raise a little hell. Today, there are 11 Camps around the world, with additional programs in Africa and Vietnam. Through the Camps, well over 135,000 children have had the chance to experience what childhood was meant to be.
"We will miss our friend Paul Newman, but are lucky ourselves to have known such a remarkable person."

He was a pretty awesome guy and the world is a bit sadder and less tasty without him.

Hmmm...

How come Conservatives are against abortion (or the Pill for that matter) but see no problem with sending 20 year-olds to their sad desert death? 'Cos they're not zygotes? No-one Conservative or Liberal has ever been able to answer that paradox satisfactorily for me. Against birth control and abortion=pro-death penalty? Ahhhh yes...Teh Old Testament... Do the words "Conservative" and "Liberal" need to be capitalised or am I being all Euro-trash? Would a dessert death as opposed to a desert death be slightly radder? Wouldn't we be better off if Dubya wasn't an Evangelical twat who believed that this war might be the beginning of Armageddon leading to The Rapture and Heaven and la-di-da? Have I had one too many glasses of wine? Yes. I have.

Oh Piss Off Tom McClusky

If this goes into effect, I might just move to Canada.
Go ahead, read it. I'll wait here.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB121745387879898315.html?mod=googlenews_wsj

Yep, they're trying to say the Pill, IUD, etc. is abortion. Last I checked, Roe v. Wade hadn't been overturned. It's barely hanging' on a string but it's still there. I wish someone would tell these fucktards over at the Family Research Council that a single-cell fertilised egg isn't a child or as they call it "the tiniest boys and girls". Give me a fucking break. Let's look at it for a sec from their point of view. When two people have sex without any form a birth control chances are they will conceive. There's also a huge chance that the woman's body will flush out that teeny tiny single cell and she won't ever know she had been "pregnant". Does that make god an abortionist? Uh, yeah, if he existed, but that's a rant for another day.

That's what makes me so mad though. These people and this administration is trying to legislate their religion. Not everyone is an Evangelical. I'd reckon they're in the minority yet these assholes scream so fucking loud until they get their religious beliefs into law. WTF?

I don't get why the more mainstream and moderate Christians aren't pissed off by these people. If I was a Christian I'd be pissed at the religious right for making a bad name for all of us. I think it would be grand if the moderate Christians, Jews, Agnostics and Atheists could band together to take down the religious right. Just put all philosophical squabbles aside for a bit and, I dunno, have like a Super Friends type thing to get rid of these jerks. I'm afraid if we can't work together on this that it's going to get out of control. They don't call them slippery slopes for nothin'.